Funeral day

It's funny - not in a humorous way - I looked on here and saw that I've named this diary "Random Observations of a 30yo Grandpa". Today, we buried my 84yo grandmother.

It comes and goes, the realization. I've lost my grandfathers a while back, but never a grandmother until now. This was Granny, my step-father's mother. I don't get along with my step-dad, but his family is another situation. Granny was a very nice, loving woman, at least to me. I didn't know her as well as I would have liked, but every time I ever saw her, she made me feel like part of the family, which beats anything her son usually does. I'm not in the mood to rip Wayne (step-dad) to pieces. His mother just died and was buried today, and I'm feeling sentimental, even about HIM.

Peggy, Allen, and Edmund, Wayne's siblings, were there. All seven of us kids were there. Jerry wore his Army uniform. I saw Henrietta, Granny's sister, for the first time in a very long time. She said something to My Mikey that almost made me cry. It's kinda silly, I guess, but she told Mikey he had cold hands. Then she said, "Cold hands, warm heart!" That was just like something Memaw, my mother's mother, would say.

Mama said she's afraid her "first mother-in-law", Nanny, my late father's mother, might be dying pretty soon. I don't know what to think of that. I have a very love-hate relationship with Nanny, but there's no denying that on both parts, it's an intense love, even when we're screaming and hollering at each other, which, unfortunately, happens sometimes. Nanny and Memaw are both 85. Granny would have been, had she made it to her birthday of August 4.

This is the time I've been fearing all my adult life. The loss of my grandparents. I've always relied so heavily on my grandmothers, in particular. Granpa and Papaw have been gone for some time already. I miss them, and sometimes I get sad about them, but mostly, I have learned to deal with not having them anymore....but my grandmothers....that's another story.

Today was the first step in the next chapter of my life. I'm praying that if Mama was right about Nanny, then maybe God will have mercy enough on Nanny to take her quietly. I hope and pray He has mercy on her, for her life has been extremely hard and unfair.

Much love to all,

Jack